Sunday, April 13, 2008
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
Baniya AD
Baniya gave matrimonial ad for his daughter, working at a call centre:"Wanted a suitable match for Chandigarh's highest paid call girl"
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Girl: Xcuse me brother, that's my seat.Boy: OK! But I'm not ur brother, my father never f#*ked ur mom.Girl: True, but my father did ! :)
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WHILE IN A DRUG STORE:Mr. Bean: I'd like some vitamins for my grandson.Clerk: Sir, vitamin A, B or C?Mr. Bean: Any will do, my grandson doesn't know the alphabet yet!!
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Patient: Nurse, I keep seeing spots in front of my eyes.Nurse: Have you seen a doctor?Patient: No, just spots.
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Few More Funny SMS 4 U : (1) why confused ? (2) really escaped (3) Co shower of Songs (4) Dramatic Lalu (5) Clean Breath for Love (6) Same service.. (7) Convenience of Nano (8) Buck stops at you (9) Apologetic Ex
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Girl: Xcuse me brother, that's my seat.Boy: OK! But I'm not ur brother, my father never f#*ked ur mom.Girl: True, but my father did ! :)
~~~~~~~~~
WHILE IN A DRUG STORE:Mr. Bean: I'd like some vitamins for my grandson.Clerk: Sir, vitamin A, B or C?Mr. Bean: Any will do, my grandson doesn't know the alphabet yet!!
~~~~~~~~~
Patient: Nurse, I keep seeing spots in front of my eyes.Nurse: Have you seen a doctor?Patient: No, just spots.
~~~~~~~~~
Few More Funny SMS 4 U : (1) why confused ? (2) really escaped (3) Co shower of Songs (4) Dramatic Lalu (5) Clean Breath for Love (6) Same service.. (7) Convenience of Nano (8) Buck stops at you (9) Apologetic Ex
Monday, January 7, 2008
Technology
One day Bill complained to his friend that his elbow really hurt.
His friend suggested that he go to a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor.
''Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it.
It only costs $10." Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store.
Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10.
The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: "You have tennis elbow.
Soak your arm in warm water. Avoid heavy lifting. It will be better in two weeks."
Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever,
he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter.
To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction.
He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10.
The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message:
"Your tap water is too hard.
Get a water softener. Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins. Your daughter is using cocaine.
Put her in a rehabilitation clinic.
Your wife is pregnant with twin girls. They aren't yours.
Get a lawyer.
And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better."
His friend suggested that he go to a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor.
''Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it.
It only costs $10." Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store.
Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10.
The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: "You have tennis elbow.
Soak your arm in warm water. Avoid heavy lifting. It will be better in two weeks."
Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever,
he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter.
To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction.
He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10.
The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message:
"Your tap water is too hard.
Get a water softener. Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins. Your daughter is using cocaine.
Put her in a rehabilitation clinic.
Your wife is pregnant with twin girls. They aren't yours.
Get a lawyer.
And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better."
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